Jokes about Animals

In a circus, a young lion is waiting for his first performance. Very nervous he asks his father:
- Father, what are all these humans doing here?
- Don't worry son; they are behind the bars.

A man walks a snail on leash and meets one his friend. Friend tells him:
- What a beautiful snail you have.
- I had one more beautiful but it escaped.

A panda walks into a bar, goes right to the counter, grabs a sandwich and after having eaten it he takes a gun out of his pocket and shoots the bartender. Then, as though nothing had happened, he walks out. Everyone in the bar is sitting all speechless and petrified but suddenly someone breaks the silence:
-What a hell was that?!?
Comes a sorrowful voice:
-It was a panda.
-???
-Perhaps you don't know what a panda is... It's a mammal that eats, shoots, and leaves.

- How hedgehogs mate?
- Carefully, very, very carefully!

- The life is full of surprises, tells a hedgehog, and gets down from a brush.

- What is the worst thing that can happen to a bat while it sleeps?
- To get a diarrhoea!

There are bats hanging of a branch upside down, all except one. Two bats comment:
- What happened to this one?
- I don't know, two minutes ago he seemed normal and then he fainted.